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Where to Start

 Time flies when there's a pandemic and you're in out of school care. I swear I just made the previous post the other day, not three weeks ago! So much has happened, but before we even begin to talk about that, let's discuss some topics that I want to go over. The next few posts that I create will be centered around behaviour. Yes, I know, everyone talks about behaviour and how it's linked to feelings, situations, peers, caregivers, weather, meals, etc. Really it all is. However, there is so much more to it than.. Joe hit Sue because he was angry that she took his truck. While Joe is probably very angry and did indeed hit her for that reason, is there something else? Should we be helping him unpack and determine where those feelings came from? So much can be learned. After that I hope to go over observation vs supervision. Yes. There is indeed a difference. Maybe not to most, but if you have intent and purpose as motivation to watch what the children do and how they int
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Time for a Change

 It's been four years since I've created a post. Holy man, time flies. A lot has happened. A lot has changed. Including living through a pandemic. I could start writing about my lapse in mental stability, how it lead me down a dark path and has taken me a very long time to get back. Or I could touch on the fact that Jerome was assessed and diagnosed with ADHD and processing delay, and that Xavier is going to be assessed for ASD giftedness. Maybe I should talk about the pandemic and all that has changed as a result of that. Nah. We don't need life updates from me. This blog is going to be taking a turn. It's going to go from a place for me to vent and expel my demons and issues, to a place of support and encouragement. One thing over the past four years that I have done is graduate from Bow Valley College in the Early Childhood Education and Development program. I am now an ECE Level 3, and on top of that I took the MacEwan University Flight Curriculum course. I have lea
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Today was NOT a good day

So I've been suffering. By "me" I mean my family. About 10 months ago I decided to make a lot of changes. School, career, kids, etc. It was a lot all at once. My thoughts? I hate change, can't stand it, so I do it all at once then it'll be over faster right? Wrong. At the same time my depression and anxiety went through the roof. I knew the anxiety would, change and all, it was inevitable. The depression however, took me by surprise, sort of... if you have it you know what I mean.. if you don't... well... It's like knowing that you're going to step on something sharp, you KNOW you will, the floor is covered in glass. But you walk through anyway, and it's not the first, second or third step. You don't know really when, but when it hits you... BAM.. it's surprising, but not really. I ramble. I thought with time things would get better. Getting used to change takes time. However, over the past 6 months, things have gotten worse.
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The End isn't always THE End

After almost seven years I'm closing my dayhome. I've had the same girl with me for four of those years. None of my kids were with me less than a year. It's amazing how attached you get to other peoples children. Finding the courage to tell the parents I was closing was the most difficult thing I've ever ever had to do. I know it won't be the last difficult thing, and I know that there will be moments in my life that will not even compare to this. For now, this is my life. I cry at the thought of losing these kids. I smile at the thought of working outside my home again. I get upset when I think of all the things I'm going to miss with this. I laugh at the thought of getting my art "studio" back. I am conflicted emotionally. My husband, my boys, they've got my back. They're supportive and encouraging. I've got wonderful family and friends to help me through this. It is a selfish thing of me to feel this way, however, I need to
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Boys - Girls - KIDS!

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I haven't blogged in a while. There's been nothing really to say. Life got really busy at the beginning of September... I mean... CRAZY BUSY... Scouts started up again, school, taekwondo, gymnastics, fundraising... my goodness... we're in the thick of it... While all of those things could bring a "blog worthy" post, there's something else I want to talk about. I have a child. He's seven years old. He's a boy. Definitely. Loves guns, getting dirty, trucks, cars, airplanes, emojis, pink and purple... wait... what?!? You mean to tell me boys can like things that may be meant for girls?? Holy shit. No way. We went shopping for clothes for school. Do you think we could find ANYTHING in the boys section that had emojis on it? He loves emojis. I have no idea why, but his favorite one is the one with the hearts in the eyes.... We went over to the girls section. EMOJIS GALORE. I mean it! Pants, purses, sweaters, longs sleeve shirts, short sleeve
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If you can't say something nice....

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It's been a little bit since my last post. I didn't think I had anything to write about. I guess I was wrong. I go out to the dog park to walk my dog (duh) and enjoy walking and seeing all the fluffies. Make me quite happy to do so. Yesterday the kids and I went and walked for an hour and a half. We did one loop, walk down to the river, walked back did another loop then went home. I was shocked at how long we had gone for! I wasn't out of breath, my feet/knees/hips didn't hurt, it was amazing! I wish that's where it could end. Just there. It'd be better if it did. But that's not where it ends. Unfortunately some jerk excuse of a human being decided to call out to me... "YOU SHOULDN'T BE WEARING THOSE SHORTS!!!"... Devastation. Embarrassment. Humiliation. If I could have crawled under the big rock in the field, I would have. My boys didn't really hear it, luckily they were too engaged with a little brown fluffy dog that was
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Too Much Information? Perhaps.

Let's face it. I'm honest. Albeit a little TOO honest, but at least I don't lie to you about what's going on. I procrastinate. I obsess. I control. I care. I share... everything. All that and more. I've told many people about my weight loss surgery. Only because some of them would've found out anyway, so why not hear it from the horses mouth... so to speak. This way if they have questions they can ask, and I can see their reaction first hand. There have been a few people that while they seem supportive are not REALLY supportive.... let me explain. My friends .... the ones that care about me and not about comparing our bodies.... will say: how are you? how are you feeling? My friends ... the ones that care about me but are very curious about comparing our bodies... will say: how are you? how much have you lost so far? Seem innocent? Yes. It does. Until you see their reaction. I've lost 66lbs so far. Yes! 66lbs! Holy crap! When I mention how much
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