A glimpse into my personal insanity

Last year I lost a cousin. I didn't know him very well, but well enough that I was saddened by the loss, especially because he was so young. He had leukemia and ended up passing away from complications. Now I went out there last October, I arrived the day after he had passed. I was hoping to get there in time to see him and actually say good-bye, but it wasn't meant to be. While I was there I felt sad for the loss, but at the same time it was hard not to feel loved. Everybody had gathered and was sharing stories and feelings and food! There were a lot of tears, some laughter, smiles and a general feeling of family gathering Now, not so many months later, something terrible is happening. The family is splitting. Tearing apart from the seams. And the two young boys that called him Daddy, are suffering for it. Some people are trying to reason this out. "It's part of the grieving process" "Selfish, that's what they're being, selfish" "What a mor

On my thirtieth birthday I learned that I still have a lot to learn. I've been told that I'm no longer 'in my twenties', that I've hit a 'milestone', that 'it's all down-hill from here'... but... why? Why does it matter that I'm no longer in my twenties? Is it really a milestone? And who decided when the hill goes up and down? As far as I'm concerned, I'm almost exactly where I want to be in life. I've got two of the most wonderful, beautiful, loving boys in the world. A husband that has been with me for 12 years and married to me for 7 years. What more could I ask for? I was actually told that I need perspective... really? I need perspective? Perspective: stems from the latin meaning to look at or inspect closely. Defined as a way of regarding situations, facts, etc. and judging their relative importance. If I look at my life I can list my education, work experience, etc. but this is not a resume. So when I look at the situation