Weak Moment

Over the last few days, I've been having weak moments. Mostly when I'm by myself. When Sylvain, or the boys are with me, I seem to be stronger. As soon as I'm by myself, I start have arguments with my own brain. Yikes. I know.

I went to Toys 'R Us yesterday to pick up a few things, and I had a few other stops first. Get gas in the RAV and get something from AMA, no biggie right? Wrong. I filled the car, and headed over to AMA. I started telling myself how nice it would be to have an Iced Capp, it's such a warm day, why not have a little one... no, you can't, you'll ruin all your work. Okay, I won't, but what about getting something from McDonalds? No, you can't do that either, that's bad. Well, if I go to Tim's and JUST get the Iced Capp... and it went on and on like that.

Sheesh.

In the end, I made it to Toys 'R Us without stopping at any fast food joints. Once I got in there, I thought, whew, I'm okay now. No, not so much. I hovered around the checkouts for a bit, there're chocolate bars there. Oh god. Now what. I grabbed a diet coke out of the fridge, then I did it. I grabbed a Crunchie bar. And yes. I ate it. :(

I had a weak moment. I gave into my craving. But once I had it, I thought, alright, I slipped up. Just count it in the diary, and move on. So I did. I counted my points, and I moved on. And for some reason, I feel okay about it. Usually I think what I would've done is, oh crap, I messed up, oh well, may as well go eat that cake then. THAT was old me. New me is much more positive, I had moment, and now it's passed, I chose to eat that bar.

I think that was the defining moment. To admit that it was a choice, not an inevitability, it was my choice, and I can just move on.

Yes. It was a moment of weakness and moment of clairty. Yay me!

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